“We Created Frankenstein”: How creating an actual Frankenstein Would Have Been Less Time Consuming

For my final project, I randomly rearranged the scripts of Oliver Stone’s “Platoon” (1986), “Nixon” (1995), “World Trade Center” (2006), and “W.” (2008).

41CNPMJ6BJL platoon-movie-poster w_ver6 world_trade_center

My reasoning in picking these four films was that they were all directed by the same director, and each deal with a unique American event: the Vietnam War, the presidencies of Richard Nixon and George W. Bush, and the 9/11 World Trade Center attacks. My goal was to see the effect that mashing together four scripts together and randomizing the lines would have on the traditional film narrative. I also wanted to create interesting unintentional juxtapositions between “Nixon” and “W.” (as they are popularly received as the most polarizing presidents of the past sixty years), “Platoon” and “Nixon” (as the Vietnam War was still being fought under Nixon’s presidency), “WTC” and” W.” (as 9/11 happened early in Bush’s presidency and forever shaped his legacy, America, and the world as we know it, and “Platoon” and “WTC” (as both films deal with average Americans thrust into exceptional circumstances and fall victim to their surroundings, whether it be in the jungles of Vietnam, or underneath the rubble of the World Trade Center).

I knew going into this project that it would be very time-consuming to create a new script based off of randomly selected lines of text from four other scripts, but I was up for the task. It took me a few days to complete the project, and I hoped to edit together the footage from the original films in the most interesting juxtapositions in the script. Unfortunately, this proved impossible as once “W.” was in the editor, it no longer had sound, “Nixon” wouldn’t load into the editor, and even a ten second clip from “Platoon” took close to two hours to render in the editor. If those issues didn’t factor into the process of this project, I think it would have added a new take on changing of film narrative and its juxtapositions that I was striving for. Regardless, I am still proud of the finished script: “We Created a Frankenstein” (the title comes from a line on p. 92 that Erlichman delivers), which can be found here:

My methodology was first to find the four scripts. Unfortunately only “Nixon” and “Platoon” were online and able to be copied and pasted, whereas the scripts for “World Trade Center” and “W.” were only available as photo pdfs. This meant I had to print out those two scripts, and assign each line a number. Once I finished assigning each line a number in both of those scripts, I selected all of “Nixon” and “Platoon” and copied and pasted the scripts into TextEdit, along with numbers 1-1029. Then I randomized that text file on textmechanic.com. Once I got the randomized list, I typed out the new script into the screenwriting program Celtx. I knew I wanted to at least get 100 pages of a script, as all four films were over 100 pages. I stopped at 102, because I thought ending on one of Chris (from Platoon)’s monologue was significant, as it deals a lot with Americans fighting for freedom (a tenet of Nixon and Bush’s philosophy on American foreign policy, along with being the belief that soldiers are supposed to share, and NYPD cops saving those in the WTC on 9/11).

Here are the most interesting juxtapositions I found throughout the script:

Screen Shot 2015-04-30 at 1.44.08 PM Screen Shot 2015-04-30 at 1.44.47 PM    Screen Shot 2015-04-30 at 1.45.51 PM Screen Shot 2015-04-30 at 1.46.27 PM Screen Shot 2015-04-30 at 1.47.22 PM Screen Shot 2015-04-30 at 1.52.03 PMScreen Shot 2015-04-30 at 1.48.17 PM Screen Shot 2015-04-30 at 1.48.55 PM Screen Shot 2015-04-30 at 1.49.43 PM Screen Shot 2015-04-30 at 1.50.23 PM Screen Shot 2015-04-30 at 1.51.22 PM Screen Shot 2015-04-30 at 1.45.13 PMScreen Shot 2015-04-30 at 1.45.22 PMScreen Shot 2015-04-30 at 1.45.28 PM

Of course, this is all very nonsensical, but there are some small moments of intrigue within this script. I really enjoyed making it, though part of me wishes I picked a less time-consuming task.

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Meditation #8

This week, after much thinking of what Twitter bot to make, I was inspired by @everyword to make @EveryMLBPlayer. The bot posts the name of every person to appear in a major league baseball game and the years they played from May 4, 1871-April 13, 2015. The bot posts every 2 hours. I’m a big baseball fan and every time I see the name of a player from my childhood who played for a few years, it’s a quick flood of nostalgia. I imagine only baseball fans would appreciate this account, as they might enjoy seeing a star player reduced to their name and the years they played, or recognizing a journeyman pitcher who played for a few months for their favorite team as a kid. My methodology was that I took the list of baseball players from baseball-reference.com, and randomized it, so there could be no clear tracking on what player could be tweeted out next. I did have a terrifying thought, though–this bot hypothetically could never end, as there will always be new baseball players. I guess if I wanted to, each year I could add new baseball players to the list.

Meditation 7

I never understood why people didn’t like the live-action How the Grinch Stole Christmas movie that came out in 2000. I loved it and still do. One of my favorite scenes is where the Grinch holds the Whoville Phonebook and reads the names alphabetically, adding a “I HATE YOU!” after each. The scene can be found here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=86jbnMOAcy0

So, for my meditation this week, I made the Twitter account @grinchphonebook. Every half hour it tweets out names in the WhoVille Phonebook alphabetically, adding a “…I HATE YOU!” after each name.

The bio reads: “The official phonebook for residents of Whoville. We apologize for the vandalism attached to each name, and are currently investigating.” So, in my mind, this Twitter account was hacked by the Grinch to yell “I HATE YOU!” after each name.

When I first thought of this idea, I didn’t think it would be too hard to make, but I was pretty mistaken. Since the scene actually only features two names (they were the first ones I tweeted out), I had to create a phonebook for the Who’s.

Since the live-action film came out in 2000, I took the Social Security’s most popular names of the 2000’s, and used those as my first names. The original cartoon TV special came out in 1966, so I used the Social Securitiy’s most popular names of the 1960’s for the middle names.

I used the extremely helpful tool “http://alphabetizer.flap.tv” to alphabetize the first and middle names. It also allowed me to add ” Who…I HATE YOU! ” after a term, so I used that as my opportunity to save some time and make the middle name list also the middle and last name list.

Once I had the separate list of first names and middle names, I randomized the middle names, so it would seem more natural and realistic as a name, as our middle names aren’t also alphabetized in conjunction with our first names. I then used textmechanic.com to insert line breaks in each of these lists, so they could be merged. I merged the two columns of text, and I got my full list of names:

Aardvarkian Abakenezer Who…I HATE YOU!
Aaron B. Benson Who…I HATE YOU!
Abby Patty Who…I HATE YOU!
Abigail Ellen Who…I HATE YOU!
Abraham Susan Who…I HATE YOU!
Adam Veronica Who…I HATE YOU!
Addison Anthony Who…I HATE YOU!
Adrian Glen Who…I HATE YOU!
Adriana Darryl Who…I HATE YOU!
Adrianna Debra Who…I HATE YOU!
Aidan Stacey Who…I HATE YOU!
Aiden Belinda Who…I HATE YOU!
Alan Bob Who…I HATE YOU!
Alana Arthur Who…I HATE YOU!
Alejandro Derek Who…I HATE YOU!
Alex Marcia Who…I HATE YOU!
Alexa Joy Who…I HATE YOU!
Alexander Loretta Who…I HATE YOU!
Alexandra Jon Who…I HATE YOU!
Alexandria Kelly Who…I HATE YOU!
Alexia Herbert Who…I HATE YOU!
Alexis Ronnie Who…I HATE YOU!
Alexis Rachel Who…I HATE YOU!
Alicia Jeff Who…I HATE YOU!
Allison Maureen Who…I HATE YOU!
Alondra Vickie Who…I HATE YOU!
Alyssa Wanda Who…I HATE YOU!
Amanda Tracey Who…I HATE YOU!
Amber Melody Who…I HATE YOU!
Amelia Annette Who…I HATE YOU!
Amy Thomas Who…I HATE YOU!
Ana Alvin Who…I HATE YOU!
Andrea Jimmy Who…I HATE YOU!
Andres Judith Who…I HATE YOU!
Andrew Holly Who…I HATE YOU!
Angel Theresa Who…I HATE YOU!
Angel Henry Who…I HATE YOU!
Angela Alice Who…I HATE YOU!
Angelica Sylvia Who…I HATE YOU!
Angelina Beth Who…I HATE YOU!
Anna Tracy Who…I HATE YOU!
Anthony Carlos Who…I HATE YOU!
Antonio Steve Who…I HATE YOU!
Ariana Matthew Who…I HATE YOU!
Arianna Antonio Who…I HATE YOU!
Ashley Terri Who…I HATE YOU!
Ashlyn Jerome Who…I HATE YOU!
Ashton Dave Who…I HATE YOU!
Aubrey Lonnie Who…I HATE YOU!
Audrey Regina Who…I HATE YOU!
Austin Yvette Who…I HATE YOU!
Autumn Carrie Who…I HATE YOU!
Ava Audrey Who…I HATE YOU!
Avery Norman Who…I HATE YOU!
Ayden Monica Who…I HATE YOU!
Bailey Jesse Who…I HATE YOU!
Benjamin Tracy Who…I HATE YOU!
Bianca Joe Who…I HATE YOU!
Blake Marvin Who…I HATE YOU!
Braden Raymond Who…I HATE YOU!
Bradley Sonya Who…I HATE YOU!
Brady Bryan Who…I HATE YOU!
Brandon Julia Who…I HATE YOU!
Brayden Katherine Who…I HATE YOU!
Breanna Andrea Who…I HATE YOU!
Brendan Cheryl Who…I HATE YOU!
Brian Tom Who…I HATE YOU!
Briana Shari Who…I HATE YOU!
Brianna Stacy Who…I HATE YOU!
Brittany Dwayne Who…I HATE YOU!
Brody Gregg Who…I HATE YOU!
Brooke Mary Who…I HATE YOU!
Brooklyn Tommy Who…I HATE YOU!
Bryan Becky Who…I HATE YOU!
Bryce Robin Who…I HATE YOU!
Bryson Micheal Who…I HATE YOU!
Caden Gina Who…I HATE YOU!
Caitlin Denise Who…I HATE YOU!
Caitlyn Jody Who…I HATE YOU!
Caleb James Who…I HATE YOU!
Cameron Dean Who…I HATE YOU!
Camila April Who…I HATE YOU!
Carlos Joan Who…I HATE YOU!
Caroline Carla Who…I HATE YOU!
Carson Keith Who…I HATE YOU!
Carter Kirk Who…I HATE YOU!
Cassandra Yolanda Who…I HATE YOU!
Cassidy Wendy Who…I HATE YOU!
Catherine Stanley Who…I HATE YOU!
Cesar Pam Who…I HATE YOU!
Charles Maria Who…I HATE YOU!
Charlotte John Who…I HATE YOU!
Chase Tami Who…I HATE YOU!
Chelsea Duane Who…I HATE YOU!
Cheyenne Anne Who…I HATE YOU!
Chloe Christina Who…I HATE YOU!
Christian Gloria Who…I HATE YOU!
Christina Richard Who…I HATE YOU!
Christopher Diane Who…I HATE YOU!
Cindy Lou Who…I HATE YOU!
Claire Tyrone Who…I HATE YOU!
Cody Stephanie Who…I HATE YOU!
Colby Tanya Who…I HATE YOU!
Cole Kristen Who…I HATE YOU!
Colin Clifford Who…I HATE YOU!
Collin Cynthia Who…I HATE YOU!
Colton Carl Who…I HATE YOU!
Conner Tina Who…I HATE YOU!
Connor Kevin Who…I HATE YOU!
Cooper Deborah Who…I HATE YOU!
Courtney Charlotte Who…I HATE YOU!
Cristian Elaine Who…I HATE YOU!
Crystal Roberta Who…I HATE YOU!
Daisy Anna Who…I HATE YOU!
Dakota Joseph Who…I HATE YOU!
Dalton Connie Who…I HATE YOU!
Damian Kent Who…I HATE YOU!
Daniel Kathryn Who…I HATE YOU!
Daniela Diana Who…I HATE YOU!
Danielle Dana Who…I HATE YOU!
David Pamela Who…I HATE YOU!
Delaney Johnny Who…I HATE YOU!
Derek Jason Who…I HATE YOU!
Destiny Clarence Who…I HATE YOU!
Devin Stuart Who…I HATE YOU!
Devon Dale Who…I HATE YOU!
Diana Laura Who…I HATE YOU!
Diego Steven Who…I HATE YOU!
Dominic Mike Who…I HATE YOU!
Donovan Brenda Who…I HATE YOU!
Dylan Frederick Who…I HATE YOU!
Edgar Shawn Who…I HATE YOU!
Eduardo Karl Who…I HATE YOU!
Edward Bruce Who…I HATE YOU!
Edwin Edward Who…I HATE YOU!
Eli Terry Who…I HATE YOU!
Elias Lynn Who…I HATE YOU!
Elijah Darlene Who…I HATE YOU!
Elizabeth Paula Who…I HATE YOU!
Ella Lee Who…I HATE YOU!
Ellie Darrell Who…I HATE YOU!
Emily Rick Who…I HATE YOU!
Emma Jacqueline Who…I HATE YOU!
Emmanuel Valerie Who…I HATE YOU!
Eric Bernard Who…I HATE YOU!
Erica Christine Who…I HATE YOU!
Erick Edwin Who…I HATE YOU!
Erik Kelly Who…I HATE YOU!
Erin Barbara Who…I HATE YOU!
Ethan Brett Who…I HATE YOU!
Eva Carmen Who…I HATE YOU!
Evan Reginald Who…I HATE YOU!
Evelyn Melinda Who…I HATE YOU!
Faith Tony Who…I HATE YOU!
Fernando Curtis Who…I HATE YOU!
Francisco Joann Who…I HATE YOU!
Gabriel Nicole Who…I HATE YOU!
Gabriela Eric Who…I HATE YOU!
Gabriella Sharon Who…I HATE YOU!
Gabrielle Sue Who…I HATE YOU!
Gage Melanie Who…I HATE YOU!
Garrett Doris Who…I HATE YOU!
Gavin Lisa Who…I HATE YOU!
Genesis Peggy Who…I HATE YOU!
George Greg Who…I HATE YOU!
Gianna Bobby Who…I HATE YOU!
Giovanni Allen Who…I HATE YOU!
Giselle Bonnie Who…I HATE YOU!
Grace Sheri Who…I HATE YOU!
Gracie Marie Who…I HATE YOU!
Grant Vanessa Who…I HATE YOU!
Gregory Janice Who…I HATE YOU!
Hailey Lance Who…I HATE YOU!
Haley Kerry Who…I HATE YOU!
Hannah Helen Who…I HATE YOU!
Hayden Leslie Who…I HATE YOU!
Hector Shirley Who…I HATE YOU!
Henry Kristin Who…I HATE YOU!
Hope Jeanette Who…I HATE YOU!
Hunter Kathleen Who…I HATE YOU!
Ian Elizabeth Who…I HATE YOU!
Isaac Erik Who…I HATE YOU!
Isabel Sandra Who…I HATE YOU!
Isabella Christopher Who…I HATE YOU!
Isabelle Glenn Who…I HATE YOU!
Isaiah Shannon Who…I HATE YOU!
Ivan Leon Who…I HATE YOU!
Jack Janet Who…I HATE YOU!
Jackson Renee Who…I HATE YOU!
Jacob Joanne Who…I HATE YOU!
Jacqueline Cathy Who…I HATE YOU!
Jada Benjamin Who…I HATE YOU!
Jade Heidi Who…I HATE YOU!
Jaden Donna Who…I HATE YOU!
Jake Terry Who…I HATE YOU!
Jalen Tim Who…I HATE YOU!
James Sheryl Who…I HATE YOU!
Jared Darin Who…I HATE YOU!
Jasmin Angela Who…I HATE YOU!
Jasmine Roy Who…I HATE YOU!
Jason Ralph Who…I HATE YOU!
Javier Douglas Who…I HATE YOU!
Jayden …I HATE YOU!
Jayla Carolyn Who…I HATE YOU!
Jazmin Crystal Who…I HATE YOU!
Jeffrey Scott Who…I HATE YOU!
Jenna Rhonda Who…I HATE YOU!
Jennifer Jeffrey Who…I HATE YOU!
Jeremiah Jerry Who…I HATE YOU!
Jeremy Kenneth Who…I HATE YOU!
Jesse Brent Who…I HATE YOU!
Jessica Marilyn Who…I HATE YOU!
Jesus Ruth Who…I HATE YOU!
Jillian Earl Who…I HATE YOU!
Jocelyn Harold Who…I HATE YOU!
Joel Patrick Who…I HATE YOU!
John Kristine Who…I HATE YOU!
Johnathan Howard Who…I HATE YOU!
Jonah Felicia Who…I HATE YOU!
Jonathan Darren Who…I HATE YOU!
Jordan Lawrence Who…I HATE YOU!
Jordan Melvin Who…I HATE YOU!
Jordyn Vernon Who…I HATE YOU!
Jorge Rose Who…I HATE YOU!
Jose Colleen Who…I HATE YOU!
Joseph Gerald Who…I HATE YOU!
Joshua Franklin Who…I HATE YOU!
Josiah Wayne Who…I HATE YOU!
Juan Kyle Who…I HATE YOU!
Julia Frank Who…I HATE YOU!
Julian Larry Who…I HATE YOU!
Juliana Leslie Who…I HATE YOU!
Justin Brad Who…I HATE YOU!
Kaden Jane Who…I HATE YOU!
Kaitlyn Cindy Who…I HATE YOU!
Kaleb Francis Who…I HATE YOU!
Karen Gary Who…I HATE YOU!
Karina Teresa Who…I HATE YOU!
Kate Harry Who…I HATE YOU!
Katelyn George Who…I HATE YOU!
Katherine Deanna Who…I HATE YOU!
Kathryn Troy Who…I HATE YOU!
Katie Gregory Who…I HATE YOU!
Kayla Alfred Who…I HATE YOU!
Kaylee Theodore Who…I HATE YOU!
Kelly Lori Who…I HATE YOU!
Kelsey Ricky Who…I HATE YOU!
Kendall Judy Who…I HATE YOU!
Kennedy Gene Who…I HATE YOU!
Kenneth Karen Who…I HATE YOU!
Kevin Traci Who…I HATE YOU!
Kiara Amanda Who…I HATE YOU!
Kimberly Eileen Who…I HATE YOU!
Kyle Gordon Who…I HATE YOU!
Kylee Heather Who…I HATE YOU!
Kylie Bill Who…I HATE YOU!
Landon Jamie Who…I HATE YOU!
Laura Albert Who…I HATE YOU!
Lauren Victoria Who…I HATE YOU!
Layla Kathy Who…I HATE YOU!
Leah Todd Who…I HATE YOU!
Leonardo Craig Who…I HATE YOU!
Leslie Roger Who…I HATE YOU!
Levi Jeanne Who…I HATE YOU!
Liam Billy Who…I HATE YOU!
Liliana Jack Who…I HATE YOU!
Lillian Walter Who…I HATE YOU!
Lilly Penny Who…I HATE YOU!
Lily Vincent Who…I HATE YOU!
Lindsey Mark Who…I HATE YOU!
Logan Victor Who…I HATE YOU!
Lucas Natalie Who…I HATE YOU!
Lucy Patricia Who…I HATE YOU!
Luis Jeffery Who…I HATE YOU!
Luke Jonathan Who…I HATE YOU!
Lydia Tammy Who…I HATE YOU!
Mackenzie Tammie Who…I HATE YOU!
Madeline Guy Who…I HATE YOU!
Madelyn Willie Who…I HATE YOU!
Madison Glenda Who…I HATE YOU!
Makayla Derrick Who…I HATE YOU!
Makenzie Vicki Who…I HATE YOU!
Malachi Fred Who…I HATE YOU!
Manuel Dawn Who…I HATE YOU!
Marco Michele Who…I HATE YOU!
Marcus Shelia Who…I HATE YOU!
Margaret Michelle Who…I HATE YOU!
Maria Lorraine Who…I HATE YOU!
Mariah Jodi Who…I HATE YOU!
Mario Mitchell Who…I HATE YOU!
Marissa Michael Who…I HATE YOU!
Mark Kimberly Who…I HATE YOU!
Martin Randy Who…I HATE YOU!
Mary Toni Who…I HATE YOU!
Mason Kim Who…I HATE YOU!
Matthew Bradley Who…I HATE YOU!
Max Yvonne Who…I HATE YOU!
Maxwell Rita Who…I HATE YOU!
Maya Sarah Who…I HATE YOU!
Mckenzie Sally Who…I HATE YOU!
Megan Tonya Who…I HATE YOU!
Melanie Donald Who…I HATE YOU!
Melissa Suzanne Who…I HATE YOU!
Mia Martin Who…I HATE YOU!
Micah Catherine Who…I HATE YOU!
Michael Robert Who…I HATE YOU!
Michelle Ray Who…I HATE YOU!
Miguel Phyllis Who…I HATE YOU!
Mikayla Sheila Who…I HATE YOU!
Miranda Ronald Who…I HATE YOU!
Molly Andrew Who…I HATE YOU!
Morgan Andre Who…I HATE YOU!
Mya Linda Who…I HATE YOU!
Naomi Nicholas Who…I HATE YOU!
Natalia Ernest Who…I HATE YOU!
Natalie Betty Who…I HATE YOU!
Nathan Rebecca Who…I HATE YOU!
Nathaniel Sara Who…I HATE YOU!
Nevaeh Randall Who…I HATE YOU!
Nicholas Perry Who…I HATE YOU!
Nicolas Martha Who…I HATE YOU!
Nicole Juan Who…I HATE YOU!
Noah Alexander Who…I HATE YOU!
Nolan Alan Who…I HATE YOU!
Oliver Amy Who…I HATE YOU!
Olivia Marc Who…I HATE YOU!
Omar Warren Who…I HATE YOU!
Oscar Don Who…I HATE YOU!
Owen Gilbert Who…I HATE YOU!
Paige Leonard Who…I HATE YOU!
Parker Dennis Who…I HATE YOU!
Patrick Marcus Who…I HATE YOU!
Paul Carol Who…I HATE YOU!
Payton Jay Who…I HATE YOU!
Peter Phillip Who…I HATE YOU!
Peyton Danny Who…I HATE YOU!
Peyton Adam Who…I HATE YOU!
Preston Barry Who…I HATE YOU!
Rachel Rickey Who…I HATE YOU!
Raymond Brian Who…I HATE YOU!
Reagan Calvin Who…I HATE YOU!
Rebecca Chad Who…I HATE YOU!
Ricardo Laurie Who…I HATE YOU!
Richard Kurt Who…I HATE YOU!
Riley Sandy Who…I HATE YOU!
Riley Gail Who…I HATE YOU!
Robert Chris Who…I HATE YOU!
Ruby Anita Who…I HATE YOU!
Ryan Dan Who…I HATE YOU!
Rylee Eddie Who…I HATE YOU!
Sabrina Virginia Who…I HATE YOU!
Sadie Norma Who…I HATE YOU!
Samantha Karla Who…I HATE YOU!
Samuel Debbie Who…I HATE YOU!
Sara Timothy Who…I HATE YOU!
Sarah Maurice Who…I HATE YOU!
Savannah Evelyn Who…I HATE YOU!
Sean Gwendolyn Who…I HATE YOU!
Sebastian Alicia Who…I HATE YOU!
Serenity William Who…I HATE YOU!
Sergio Joyce Who…I HATE YOU!
Seth Philip Who…I HATE YOU!
Shane Russell Who…I HATE YOU!
Shawn Shelly Who…I HATE YOU!
Shelby Jo Who…I HATE YOU!
Sierra Peter Who…I HATE YOU!
Skylar Frances Who…I HATE YOU!
Sofia Samuel Who…I HATE YOU!
Sophia Stephen Who…I HATE YOU!
Sophie Nancy Who…I HATE YOU!
Spencer Jim Who…I HATE YOU!
Stephanie Joel Who…I HATE YOU!
Stephen David Who…I HATE YOU!
Steven Dorothy Who…I HATE YOU!
Summer Jennifer Who…I HATE YOU!
Sydney Shelley Who…I HATE YOU!
Tanner Charlene Who…I HATE YOU!
Taylor Shane Who…I HATE YOU!
Thomas Charles Who…I HATE YOU!
Tiffany Jean Who…I HATE YOU!
Timothy Paul Who…I HATE YOU!
Travis Louis Who…I HATE YOU!
Trenton Wesley Who…I HATE YOU!
Trevor Sean Who…I HATE YOU!
Trinity Tamara Who…I HATE YOU!
Tristan Jose Who…I HATE YOU!
Tyler Nathan Who…I HATE YOU!
Valeria Melissa Who…I HATE YOU!
Valerie Sherry Who…I HATE YOU!
Vanessa Daryl Who…I HATE YOU!
Veronica Rodney Who…I HATE YOU!
Victor Manuel Who…I HATE YOU!
Victoria Eugene Who…I HATE YOU!
Vincent Beverly Who…I HATE YOU!
Wesley Leroy Who…I HATE YOU!
William Margaret Who…I HATE YOU!
Wyatt Sherri Who…I HATE YOU!
Xavier Luis Who…I HATE YOU!
Zachary Jackie Who…I HATE YOU!
Zoe Jill Who…I HATE YOU!
Zoey Julie Who…I HATE YOU!

I also added Cindy Lou Who in there. Some of names might seem a little strange, like Vincent Beverly Who, but I remembered that Lou–a man’s name– is the middle name of Cindy, I decided that it wasn’t an issue that women had male middle names and vice versa.

I created my twitter account, and signed up for twuffer.com, which schedules tweets to send out. I then sat down and copied and pasted each name individually (up until the D’s, because it was taking so long and it was tiring. I might go back and keep scheduling tweets until I get to the end of the list), and scheduled each to post every half hour.

Here are some of the interesting juxtapositions I found in my twitter feed:

Screen Shot 2015-03-30 at 12.46.43 PM

Screen Shot 2015-03-30 at 12.42.51 PM (I wish Angelina Beth Who was the name tweeted out here. That would’ve been great)

Screen Shot 2015-03-30 at 12.44.58 PM

Screen Shot 2015-03-30 at 12.40.41 PM (Though the Grinch isn’t saying Pope Francis Who, it almost seems like he’s directly yelling at the Pope because of how harmless his tweet is)

I really enjoyed this assignment. The juxtapositions come obviously with which accounts a user follows on Twitter, so they can vary, but the general result is the same: something very nice tweeted (like the Pope’s) followed by silly anger. Some of the humor of this piece comes from the fact that there’s some room for the names being ridiculous too like Sean Gwendolyn Who. That’s just funny to me. I think another part of the humor of this piece comes from the fact that it’s a very similar joke very single time. It will always be two first names, followed by “Who…I HATE YOU!” I think that’s part of the appeal of the account, similarly to that Tumblr account that posts the same photo of Dave Coulier over and over again. This piece isn’t meant to satirize, but instead take a very small part of a movie that came out fifteen years ago, and delve deeper into the universe that the film establishes in a funny and technological way.

Meditation #6

For my meditation this week, I decided to put my take on the adage that says that you can’t shout “fire!” in a theater. I wondered if it’s illegal to write “fire!” in a theater, so I tested it out. I ripped out 55 papers from a legal pad with “FIRE!” written on them. Of course, if I wasn’t doing a dry run, I wouldn’t have been able to use 55 papers most likely. Luckily I had access to Collins Theater in Collins Hall on campus and taped them to a section of seats in the theater. The following are a few pictures from the project:IMG_0679

IMG_0684

IMG_0687

I don’t think it’s illegal.

If people stumbled across 55 seats of a theater with “FIRE!” taped to them, I bet the reaction from the owners or the theater-goers would be confusion. It would not incite panic that the law is designed to prevent in the first place. No one would look at those pieces of paper and believe that there is a fire. They would all just be very confused and saddened that someone took the time to do this.

Since this is theater is part of Fordham, I think school officials would be annoyed if they discovered that I left all of the notes on the seats.

Meditation #5

For this exercise, I created a Diastic through the eDiastic generator. I input the lyrics to Will Smith’s “Parents Just Don’t Understand,” and used that title as the seed text.

Here are the original lyrics:

You know parents are the same no matter time nor place

They don’t understand that us kids are gonna make some mistakes

So to you, all the kids all across the land

There’s no need to argue, parents just don’t understand

I remember one year

My mom took me school shopping

It was me, my brother, my mom, oh, my pop, and my little sister

All hopped in the car

We headed downtown to the Gallery Mall

MY mom started bugging with the clothes she chose

I didn’t say nothing at first

I just turned up my nose

She said, “What’s wrong? This shirt cost $20”

I said, “Mom, this shirt is plaid with a butterfly collar!”

The next half hour was the same old thing

My mother buying me clothes from 1963

And then she lost her mind and did the ultimate

I asked her for Adidas and she bought me Zips!

I said, “Mom, what are you doing, you’re ruining my rep”

She said, “You’re only sixteen, you don’t have a rep yet”

I said, “Mom, let’s put these clothes back, please”

She said “no, you go to school to learn not for a fashion show”

I said, “This isn’t Sha Na Na, come on Mom, I’m not Bowzer

Mom, please put back the bell-bottom Brady Bunch trousers

But if you don’t want to I can live with that but

You gotta put back the double-knit reversible slacks”

She wasn’t moved – everything stayed the same

Inevitably the first day of school came

I thought I could get over, I tried to play sick

But my mom said, “No, no way, uh-uh, forget it”

There was nothing I could do, I tried to relax

I got dressed up in those ancient artifacts

And when I walked into school, it was just as I thought

The kids were cracking up laughing at the clothes Mom bought

And those who weren’t laughing still had a ball

Because they were pointing and whispering

As I walked down the hall

I got home and told my Mom how my day went

She said, “If they were laughing you don’t need them,

Cause they’re not good friends”

For the next six hours I tried to explain to my Mom

That I was gonna have to go through this about 200 more times

So to you all the kids all across the land

There’s no need to argue

Parents just don’t understand

Oh-kay, here’s the situation

My parents went away on a week’s vacation and

They left the keys to the brand new Porsche

Would they mind?

Umm, well, of course not

I’ll just take it for a little spin

And maybe show it off to a couple of friends

I’ll just cruise it around the neighborhood

Well, maybe I shouldn’t

Yeah, of course I should

Pay attention, here’s the thick of the plot

I pulled up to the corner at the end of my block

That’s when I saw this beautiful girlie girl walking

I picked up my car phone to perpetrate like I was talking

You should’ve seen this girl’s bodily dimensions

I honked my horn just to get her attention

She said, “Was that for me?”

I said, “Yeah”

She said, “Why?”

I said, “Come on and take a ride with a helluva guy”

She said, “How do I know you’re not sick?

You could be some deranged lunatic”

I said, “C’mon toots – my name is the Prince =

Beside, would a lunatic have a Porsche like this?”

She agreed and we were on our way

She was looking very good and so was I, I must say – word

We hit McDonald’s, pulled into the drive

We ordered two Big Macs and two large fries with Cokes

She kicked her shoes off onto the floor

She said, “Drive fast, speed turns me on”

She put her hand on my knee, I put my foot on the gas

We almost got whiplash, I took off so fast

The sun roof was open , the music was high

And this girl’s hand was steadily moving up my thigh

She had opened up three buttons on her shirt so far

I guess that’s why I didn’t notice that police car

We’re doing ninety in my Mom’s new Porsche

And to make this long story short – short

When the cop pulled me over I was scared as hell

I said, “I don’t have a license but I drive very well, officer”

I almost had a heart attack that day

Come to find out the girl was a twelve-year-old runaway

I was arrested, the car was impounded

There was no way for me to avoid being grounded

My parents had to come off from vacation to get me

I’d rather be in jail than to have my father hit me

My parents walked in

I got my grip, I said, “Ah, Mom, Dad, how was your trip?”

They didn’t speak – I said, “I want to plead my case”

But my father just shoved me in the car by my face

That was a hard ride home, I don’t know how I survived

They took turns – one would beat me while the other was driving

I can’t believe it, I just made a mistake

Well parents are the same no matter time nor place

So to you all the kids all across the land

Take it from me, parents just don’t understand

Not that impressive of a song.

Here’s the poem that was generated out of it:

Parents same parents name parents perpetrate parents

jail just must clothes

Dad nose isn’t that

Umm understand And understand understand across thought understand situation understand

I really like this poem, especially its first line, which I think could be an actual rap lyric somewhere.

I realized during this process that Will Smith’s original lyrics really emphasize “parents” and “understand” a lot, causing the two to appear many times throughout the new poem.

For my second part of the exercise, I used the GenGen generator. I was trying to think of what I could do, but then remembered that children’s book If You Give a Mouse a Cookie…, so I decided to take a spin on it through this generator.

Link: http://tinysubversions.com/gengen/gen.html?key=1NqKTmUREqem7_8F6lBroMUEAycrArAmb5HvO7FVZicQ

While this generator only changes two times (what we give the mouse, and what he asks for in return), I do think it’s still a fun take on the mouse from that book. If I were to do this again, I might improve the variables by making them correlate to one another, so as not to be so random. Perhaps what we give the mouse would be one category, and what he asks for in return would be a different category of things. I think that would be a good example of making this generator play by stricter rules, but I think the humor of it might be lost. Regardless, I’m still pretty satisfied with this generator.

Meditation #4

For Part One of this assignment, I decided to take a minute from one of my favorite Comedy Bang Bang podcast episodes “Time Bobby.” It involves Andrew Lloyd-Webber, and a little orphan boy named Fourvel entering the studio and things go awry from there. I picked the minute or so where Fourvel enters to transcribe. The link for the episode is: http://www.earwolf.com/episode/time-bobby/ and I transcribed 11:30-12:42.

Here is my transcript:

ANDREW LLOYD-WEBBER: So, um, and that’s Jesus Christ Superstar, and there’s the character.

SCOTT: Okay fantastic, well, I have many more questions like this so I uh, I…

ANDREW LLOYD-WEBBER: I hope you have thousands and thousands.

SCOTT: So here we go.

ANDREW LLOYD-WEBBER: The more probing the better.

SCOTT: Okay.

ANDREW LLOYD-WEBBER: You may ask me personal things. Doesn’t need to just be work-related. I’m giving you carte blanche.

SCOTT: Okay, all right. Personal questions. How do you feel about the main characters in Jesus Christ Superstar.

(Andrew Lloyd-Webber murmurs)

SCOTT: Do you feel like they’re the right ones you picked, and who are they?

ANDREW LLOYD-WEBBER: Do you know, Scottdrig, I have conversations with the characters from my musicals almost every—

(Knocks)

ANDREW LLOYD-WEBBER: Who’s that knocking? This is highly irregular!

SCOTT: I…This has never happened…

FOURVEL: Hello?

SCOTT: …in the middle of an interview.

FOURVEL: Hello?

ANDREW LLOYD-WEBBER: What? Who’s this little ragamuffin?

FOURVEL: Hello?

ANDREW LLOYD-WEBBER: Look at this street urchin!

FOURVEL: Hey who’s that hello?

ANDREW LLOYD-WEBBER: Who? Who are you son? Speak up, boy!

FOURVEL: Are you Andrew Lloyd Webber?

ANDREW LLOYD-WEBBER: Why yes I am! Always nice to meet a fan.

SCOTT: Oh what a smart young child you are.

FOURVEL: Oh my god, hi.

ANDREW LLOYD-WEBBER: Hello, hello young man.

FOURVEL: I’m a fan.

SCOTT: Oh.

ANDREW LLOYD-WEBBER: You’re, you’re a fan of the musical theatre?

FOURVEL: Yeah.

ANDREW LLOYD-WEBBER: And my work in it in particular?

FOURVEL: Yeah, I was lost and I heard your voice outside so I came in.

ANDREW LLOYD-WEBBER: I see he recognized my voice…

FOURVEL: Yeah.

ANDREW LLOYD-WEBBER: From outside of the building!

FOURVEL: Who wouldn’t recognize that voice?

I noticed during this exercise that if one only looked at the text, most of the humor is lost. But when the audio is playing, it’s 100% funnier. The humor is lost in translation during the transcription process.

For part two of this exercise, I decided to take a DVD case and a video game case that were both on my coffee table at the time–The Blues Brothers and MLB Slugfest 2003, respectively.

IMG_0556IMG_0557

IMG_0555IMG_0554

The transcription goes as follows:

COLLECTOR’S EDITION

JOHN BELUSHI

DAN AYKROYD

The Blues Brothers

Expanded Version With Bonus Footage

They’ll never get caught. They’re on a mission from God.

©1980 Universal City Studios, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

DVD VIDEO TM

WIDESCREEN

UNIVERSAL®

UNIVERSAL®

Collector’s

The Blues Brothers

Edition

20299

DVD VIDEO TM

JOHN BELUSHI

DAN AYKROYD

ISBN 0-7832-2804-X

0 2519-20299-2 9

The Blues Brothers

Expanded Version with Bonus Footage

After the release of Jake Blues (John Belushi) from prison, he and brother Elwood (Dan Aykroyd) go to visit the orphanage where they were raised by nuns.

They learn that the church stopped its support and will sell the place unless the tax on the property is paid within 11 days.

The brothers decide to raise the money by putting their blues band back together and staging a big gig. They may be on a “mission from God” but they’re making enemies everywhere they go. Featuring performances by some of blues finest, James Brown, Cab Calloway, Ray Charles, Aretha Franklin, and co-starring John Candy, Carrie Fisher, Henry Gibson, and Steve Lawrence.

SPECIAL FEATURES

Bonus Materials

The Stories Behind the Making of The Blues Brothers

PRODUCTION PHOTOGRAPHS

PRODUCTION NOTES

CAST & FILMMAKERS

THEATRICAL TRAILER

MENU

Includes footage not seen since the original Pinewood preview in 1980.

The Stories Behind the Making of The Blues Brothers, an original full-length documentary on the making of the film featuring interviews with director John Landis, Dan Aykroyd, The Blues Brothers Band, producer Robert K. Weiss plus never before-seen behind the scenes footage.

Theatrical Trailer.

Production Photographs.

JOHN BELUSHI DAN AYKROYD

“THE BLUES BROTHERS”

A MUSICAL COMEDY”

JAMES BROWN CAB CALLOWAY

RAY CHARLES CARRIE FISHER

ARETHA FRANKLIN HENRY GIBSON

THE BLUES BROTHERS BAND

WRITTEN BY DAN AYKROYD AND JOHN LANDIS

EXECUTIVE PRODCUER BERNIE BRILLSTEIN

PRODUCED BY ROBERT K. WEISS DIRECTED BY JOHN LANDIS

NOT RATED

A UNIVERSAL PICTURE

©1980 UNIVERSAL CITY STUDIOS, INC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

UNIVERSAL

LANGUAGE English Español Français 1:85:1 ANAMORPHIC WIDESCREEN Dolby Digital soundtracks contain up to 5.1 channels of discrete audio. Dolby Surround soundtracks contain up to 4 channels of encoded audio. Playback from 2-channel DVD outputs is compatible with stereo and Dolby Pro Logic reproduction.

DOLBY DIGITAL 5.1 SURROUND

CAPTIONS SUBTITLES Captioned Subtitulos Sous-titre COLOR Dual Layer 2 Hours 28 Minutes 20299

Supplement written, produced and directed by Joseph “J.M.” Kenny.

70 Universal City Plaza, Universal City, CA 91608 ©1998 Universal Home Video, Inc. All Rights Reserved. Printed in USA. WARNING: For private home use only. Unauthorized public performance, broadcasting or copying is a violation of applicable laws. Dolby and the Double-D symbol are trademarks of Dolby Laboratories Licensing Corporation.

THIS DISC IS COMPATIBLE WITH ALL DVD PLAYERS DISPLAYING THESE SYMBOLS, AUTHORIZED USE IN THE U.S. AND CANADA

1 NTSC

DVD VIDEO TM

It was very terrible, as most of the things I wrote were reiterating something from earlier or just straight copyright information. Here’s the MLB Slugfest 2003 transcription:

NINTENDO GAMECUBE TM

ALEX RODRIGUEZ <<

MAJOR LEAGUE BASEBALL DB 115977366

T

MLB SLUGFEST ® 2003

Official Nintendo Seal of Quality ®

MLB PLAYERS CHOICE ®

TM

MIDWAY ® ® SPORTS

EVERYONE

® E

CONTENT RATED BY

ESRB

MIDWAY SPORTS

MLB SLUGFEST 2003

NINTENDO GAMECUBE TM

1-2 Player Simultaneous Memory Card Uses 11 Blocks

WE CALL IT SLUGFEST FOR A REASON!

T XAS

The summertime game just got smokin’. MLB® Slugfest® 20-03 and Alex Rodriguez ignite America’s national pastime with a torrid blend of aggressive, adrenaline-style action and authentic Major League Baseball® credentials.

T RANGERS 3 PALARNE

FEATURES

  • Adrenaline-Style Gameplay- Over-the-top, nonstop: from blazing fastballs to screaming line drives to wall-crashing catches.
  • Fast-Action Batter/Pitcher Interface- The fastest brand of baseball you’ve ever seen.
  • Strategic Contact – Chin music, shoulder first or spikes high? Your decisions can effect the game’s momentum and final outcome.
  • Real Player Faces – Unbelievably detailed faces, right down to the gum-chewing.
  • Outrageous Animations – More than 1,500 animations, featuring your favorite MLBTM players performing as they only dream they could.
  • Fantasy Players and Stadiums – Bolster your lineup or take your game into exotic locations.

THERE’S A RIOT AT THE BAT RACK!

SPECIAL FEATURES; Dry Kill Logic’s exclusive SlugFest music video, “Riot at the Bat Rack!”

C CINCINNATI ALFONZ 13

REDSO

BIGGIO 7 LO DUCA 16

MIDWAY SPORTS

SLUGFEST.MIDWAY.COM

MIDWAY GAMES WEST INC

675 Sycamore Drive • Milpitas, CA 95035

MADE IN USA

LICENSED BY NINTENDO.

Nintendo, Nintendo GameCube and the Official Seal are trademarks of Nintendo. ©2001 Nintendo.

MLBTM Slugfest® 20-03© 2002 Midway Amusement Games, LLC. All rights reserved. SLUGFEST, MIDWAY and the Midway logos are trademarks of Midway Amusement Games, LLC. Used by permission. Portions of this software are Copyright 1998-2001 Criterion Software Ltd. And its Licensors. “Hell Above Water” performed by Curve courtesy of Universal Records under license from Universal Music Enterprises. Major League Baseball trademarks and copyrights are used with permission of Major League Baseball Properties, Inc. Visit the official website at MLB.com ©MLBPA – Official Licensee, Major League Baseball Players Association. Visit the Players Choice on the web at http://www.bigleaguers.com. Distributed under license by Midway Home Entertainment Inc.

IMPORTANT! READ THE INSTRUCTION BOOKLETB BEFORE SETUP OR USE OF YOUR SYSTEM

MLB PLAYERS FHOICE ®

TM

Official Nintendo Seal of Quality ®

THIS OFFICIAL SEAL IS YOUR ASSURANCE THAT NINTENDO HAS APPROVED THE QUALITY OF THIS PRODUCT. ALWAYS LOOK FOR THIS SEAL WHEN BUYING GAMES AND ACCESSORIES TO ENSURE COMPLETE COMPATABILITY.

WARNING: PEOPLE WHO ARE PHOTOSENSITIVE (HAVE HAD SEIZURES INDUCED BY FLASHING LIGHTS OR PATTERNS) SHOULD NOT PLAY VIDEO GAMES WITHOUT FIRST SEEING A DOCTOR.

FOR SALE, RENTAL AND USE ONLY IN USA, CANADA, MEXICO AND LATIN AMERICA.

EVERYONE

Comic Mischief Violence

RenderWare PLATFORM

DOL P GSGE

0 3171919856 6 0010

I think this transcription is funnier than The Blues Brothers one, as it has a lot of random excitement, as “THERE’S A RIOT AT THE BAT RACK!” and “WE CALL IT SLUGFEST FOR A REASON!” directly after the very mundane “1-2 Player Simultaneous Memory Card Uses 11 Blocks.”

I had some trouble at times during both the DVD and the video game cases where I didn’t know how to transcript in order. I often went from left to right from the top to the bottom, but sometimes it was better to block out sections of the case to make it more coherent. For instance, the “FEATURES” section of MLB Slugfest 2003 would have made less sense if all of the features weren’t all together, and I inserted things on the left hand side of the case instead.

Meditation #3

For this week’s meditation, I decided to alter the script of one of the most tense moments of 2001: A Space Odyssey between astronaut Dave and the murderous computer HAL 9000. The script (from IMDB) goes as follows:

Dave Bowman: Hello, HAL. Do you read me, HAL?
HAL: Affirmative, Dave. I read you.
Dave Bowman: Open the pod bay doors, HAL.
HAL: I’m sorry, Dave. I’m afraid I can’t do that.
Dave Bowman: What’s the problem?
HAL: I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do.
Dave Bowman: What are you talking about, HAL?
HAL: This mission is too important for me to allow you to jeopardize it.
Dave Bowman: I don’t know what you’re talking about, HAL.
HAL: I know that you and Frank were planning to disconnect me, and I’m afraid that’s something I cannot allow to happen.
Dave Bowman: [feigning ignorance] Where the hell did you get that idea, HAL?
HAL: Dave, although you took very thorough precautions in the pod against my hearing you, I could see your lips move.
Dave Bowman: Alright, HAL. I’ll go in through the emergency airlock.
HAL: Without your space helmet, Dave? You’re going to find that rather difficult.
Dave Bowman: HAL, I won’t argue with you anymore! Open the doors!
HAL: Dave, this conversation can serve no purpose anymore. Goodbye.

My goal was to change HAL’s dialogue into binary, since he is a computer, and that’s how he would be responding to Dave in the first place.

I first went to text mechanic and copied the above dialogue into a find and replace tool, and replaced all of the “HAL:” to “HAL 9000:” so when I continued to find and replace things, it wouldn’t replace the times Dave addresses HAL in his own dialogue. So I opened a bunch of tabs, and separated the lines of dialogue by character through the remove lines containing tool with “HAL 9000:” or “Dave Bowman:”.

So now I had a tab with Dave’s dialogue, and HAL’s dialogue. Then I had to remove the “HAL 9000:” from HAL’s dialogue, to get his speech into binary. I removed it from the find and replace tool (and copied them into a new tab). Then I copied the raw dialogue into a new tab in the text to binary tool. Unfortunately, the binary came out in one long line, so I had to separate the lines through the add line break tool at 700 characters to create 8 lines–the same amount of lines that Dave speaks, so it would match a conversation.

So now I had three pieces of text–Dave’s dialogue, 8 HAL 9000:’s, and 8 lines of binary. I opened the merge lines tool, and added a third box. I pasted each of the three texts into a box and merged the lines together. I copied that text, and then pasted it into another make line break tool, making a new line break at “HAL 9000:”.

Honestly, it probably does not translate back to real dialogue that HAL says in the movie. It’s probably cut off. But I still think the finished piece looks very interesting and cool:

Dave Bowman: Hello, HAL. Do you read me, HAL?
HAL 9000: 00100000 00100000 01000001 01100110 01100110 01101001 01110010 01101101 01100001 01110100 01101001 01110110 01100101 00101100 00100000 01000100 01100001 01110110 01100101 00101110 00100000 01001001 00100000 01110010 01100101 01100001 01100100 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00101110 00100000 00001010 00100000 00100000 01001001 00100111 01101101 00100000 01110011 01101111 01110010 01110010 01111001 00101100 00100000 01000100 01100001 01110110 01100101 00101110 00100000 01001001 00100111 01101101 00100000 01100001 01100110 01110010 01100001 01101001 01100100 00100000 01001001 00100000 01100011 01100001 01101110 00100111 01110100 00100000 01100100 01101111 00100000 01110100 01101000
Dave Bowman: Open the pod bay doors, HAL.
HAL 9000: 01100001 01110100 00101110 00100000 00001010 00100000 00100000 01001001 00100000 01110100 01101000 01101001 01101110 01101011 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01101011 01101110 01101111 01110111 00100000 01110111 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01110000 01110010 01101111 01100010 01101100 01100101 01101101 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01101010 01110101 01110011 01110100 00100000 01100001 01110011 00100000 01110111 01100101 01101100 01101100 00100000 01100001 01110011 00100000 01001001 00100000 01100100 01101111 00101110 00100000 00001010 00100000 00100000 01010100 01101000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01101101 01101001 01110011
Dave Bowman: What’s the problem?
HAL 9000: 01110011 01101001 01101111 01101110 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01110100 01101111 01101111 00100000 01101001 01101101 01110000 01101111 01110010 01110100 01100001 01101110 01110100 00100000 01100110 01101111 01110010 00100000 01101101 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01100001 01101100 01101100 01101111 01110111 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01101010 01100101 01101111 01110000 01100001 01110010 01100100 01101001 01111010 01100101 00100000 01101001 01110100 00101110 00100000 00001010 00100000 00100000 01001001 00100000 01101011 01101110 01101111 01110111 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01111001 01101111
Dave Bowman: What are you talking about, HAL?
HAL 9000: 01110101 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01000110 01110010 01100001 01101110 01101011 00100000 01110111 01100101 01110010 01100101 00100000 01110000 01101100 01100001 01101110 01101110 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01100100 01101001 01110011 01100011 01101111 01101110 01101110 01100101 01100011 01110100 00100000 01101101 01100101 00101100 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01001001 00100111 01101101 00100000 01100001 01100110 01110010 01100001 01101001 01100100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100111 01110011 00100000 01110011 01101111 01101101 01100101 01110100 01101000 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01001001
Dave Bowman: I don’t know what you’re talking about, HAL.
HAL 9000: 00100000 01100011 01100001 01101110 01101110 01101111 01110100 00100000 01100001 01101100 01101100 01101111 01110111 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01101000 01100001 01110000 01110000 01100101 01101110 00101110 00100000 00001010 00100000 00100000 01000100 01100001 01110110 01100101 00101100 00100000 01100001 01101100 01110100 01101000 01101111 01110101 01100111 01101000 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01110100 01101111 01101111 01101011 00100000 01110110 01100101 01110010 01111001 00100000 01110100 01101000 01101111 01110010 01101111 01110101 01100111 01101000 00100000 01110000 01110010 01100101 01100011 01100001 01110101 01110100 01101001 01101111 01101110 01110011
Dave Bowman: [feigning ignorance] Where the hell did you get that idea, HAL?
HAL 9000: 00100000 01101001 01101110 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01110000 01101111 01100100 00100000 01100001 01100111 01100001 01101001 01101110 01110011 01110100 00100000 01101101 01111001 00100000 01101000 01100101 01100001 01110010 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00101100 00100000 01001001 00100000 01100011 01101111 01110101 01101100 01100100 00100000 01110011 01100101 01100101 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 01110010 00100000 01101100 01101001 01110000 01110011 00100000 01101101 01101111 01110110 01100101 00101110 00100000 00001010 00100000 00100000 01010111 01101001 01110100 01101000 01101111 01110101 01110100 00100000 01111001 01101111
Dave Bowman: Alright, HAL. I’ll go in through the emergency airlock.
HAL 9000: 01110101 01110010 00100000 01110011 01110000 01100001 01100011 01100101 00100000 01101000 01100101 01101100 01101101 01100101 01110100 00101100 00100000 01000100 01100001 01110110 01100101 00111111 00100000 01011001 01101111 01110101 00100111 01110010 01100101 00100000 01100111 01101111 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01100110 01101001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01110010 01100001 01110100 01101000 01100101 01110010 00100000 01100100 01101001 01100110 01100110 01101001 01100011 01110101 01101100 01110100 00101110 00100000 00001010 00100000 00100000 01000100 01100001 01110110 01100101 00101100 00100000 01110100
Dave Bowman: HAL, I won’t argue with you anymore! Open the doors!
HAL 9000: 01101000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01100011 01101111 01101110 01110110 01100101 01110010 01110011 01100001 01110100 01101001 01101111 01101110 00100000 01100011 01100001 01101110 00100000 01110011 01100101 01110010 01110110 01100101 00100000 01101110 01101111 00100000 01110000 01110101 01110010 01110000 01101111 01110011 01100101 00100000 01100001 01101110 01111001 01101101 01101111 01110010 01100101 00101110 00100000 01000111 01101111 01101111 01100100 01100010 01111001 01100101 00101110 00100000

For the second part of this assignment, I took this picture of Aziz Ansari and Kanye West on Wikimedia Commons:
Azizkanye-2
Then I took the lyrics to Kanye West’s “Power” and copied it a bunch of times randomly into the plain text behind the image, resulting in this new image:
Azizkanye-2

Meditation #2

For my second meditation, I went on CNN’s website and replaced all of its content on the front page with today’s headlines on The Onion. It took me a long time, because I kept double clicking the links on the actual page by accident after making some progress. So I had to keep going back and remaking the page. Fortunately that only happened less than five times.

I tried to keep as much as I could of the original CNN website and replace it with The Onion, and I think I did a good job. I did delete the Ticker at the bottom, because I found it very challenging to edit, as it was scrolling the entire time. I thought deleting it also made the site look less cluttered in the first place.

Also the original headline was ‘Unprecedented’ which is short and sweet, and dissimilar to most Onion headlines which usually are pretty lengthy to hammer home the joke of the article. That’s why the headline looks slightly strange at the top, because it’s so wordy.

Screen Shot 2015-02-09 at 11

Something unexpected happened, though, during my process. Breaking News happened. It was a story about President Obama and Chancellor Merkel regarding the Ukraine. So I decided to search on The Onion’s website for a Breaking News headline that they have done before. That’s why the Coors story is there, despite not being in the initial plan.

I thought it would be interesting to replace CNN with the Onion, because I wanted to see if any of the joke articles held any weight under the seriousness of CNN. I think some of the headlines look like they could be on CNN’s website, ex. the Venus headline, and even the Uber headline (sans the picture). I also wanted to create something that poked fun at CNN, because they have become a joke in and of themselves for the past couple of years. What better way to do that than to replace their real headlines with Onion headlines?

-Jeff

Meditation #1

I picked two of Padgett’s techniques–alternate lines and transposing–and made Dadaist poem for this meditation. I had the most fun with the alternate line reading, as I had less control over the procedure than I did with transposing and making a Dadaist poem. I was tempted to change the river or the words in the poem very frequently, because I wanted it to make more sense. My alternate line reading actually made some sense, which was exciting. It probably had to do with the fact that the poem I picked to read its lines alternately was a narrative, so it didn’t change too much.

1. Dadaist poem

Original selection of an article from The Scranton Times–my hometown newspaper:

“No one knows quite what to do about a Carbondale home housing 72 snakes.

A Lackawanna County Area Agency on Aging official initially referred the matter to the city earlier this month.

Since then, the police, a dog warden, a humane officer and the state wildlife officials have gotten involved, along with city code enforcement officer Chris Pezak.

“It’s not too often you run into a situation quite like this,” Mr. Pezak said. “There were white (snakes), orange ones, green ones. They were all different colors with all different names.””

I picked this article semi-randomly, as I wanted something somewhat exciting in the original article, and to see if it changed when I picked the words at random. This is the poem I created out of it:

Aging officer names.” initially different

this,” dog “It’s officials

month. referred Carbondale Since home involved, warden,

(snakes),

Agency police, enforcement official

white different County gotten were along ones,

humane wildlife then, earlier matter into Pezak Lackawanna

snakes,

ones. situation with officer knows on code Pezak.

and green state orange have the one

all to this about quite the Chris “There housing 72 colors

were what often the like not said.

A you too Mr. to run city with all Area

They quite do a city a No a the a

It makes very little sense. I thought it was pretty interesting though that all of the “a”s in the article were alternately chosen at the very end of the poem. I imagine that was because it was easier to pick larger pieces of paper rather than the small “a.”

2. Transposing

I picked Mike Birbiglia’s book “Sleepwalk With Me” to transpose.

This is the original page:

IMG_0352

So this page highlights Mike’s experience as an altar boy when he was younger. And this is what the page looks like transposed:

IMG_0355

The sentences work the best starting at “I asked” in the center of the page. Father Jacques is portrayed now as someone who thinks he’s the new priest of a parish. And how Mike and his friends would ask him questions in order to keep drinking. And then the page solemnly ends with Mike saying he wanted to be somewhere else, though the grammar isn’t all there.

3. Alternate lines

To read something alternating by line, I picked Casey at the Bat–a poem that I’ve always enjoyed, written in 1888 about a town named Mudville that’s immersed in a baseball game, in which the power hitter Casey, whom the fans loved and trusted, comes to the plate. He is cocky, and ends up striking out. Here’s the original poem:

The outlook wasn’t brilliant for the Mudville nine that day;

The score stood four to two with but one inning more to play.

And then when Cooney died at first, and Barrows did the same,

A sickly silence fell upon the patrons of the game.

A straggling few got up to go in deep despair. The rest

Clung to that hope which springs eternal in the human breast;

They thought if only Casey could but get a whack at that—

We’d put up even money now with Casey at the bat.

But Flynn preceded Casey, as did also Jimmy Blake,

And the former was a lulu and the latter was a cake;

So upon that stricken multitude grim melancholy sat,

For there seemed but little chance of Casey’s getting to the bat.

But Flynn let drive a single, to the wonderment of all,

And Blake, the much despised, tore the cover off the ball;

And when the dust had lifted, and men saw what had occurred,

There was Jimmy safe at second and Flynn a-hugging third.

Then from 5,000 throats and more there rose a lusty yell;

It rumbled through the valley, it rattled in the dell;

It knocked upon the mountain and recoiled upon the flat,

For Casey, mighty Casey, was advancing to the bat.

There was ease in Casey’s manner as he stepped into his place;

There was pride in Casey’s bearing and a smile on Casey’s face.

And when, responding to the cheers, he lightly doffed his hat,

No stranger in the crowd could doubt ’twas Casey at the bat.

Ten thousand eyes were on him as he rubbed his hands with dirt;

Five thousand tongues applauded when he wiped them on his shirt.

Then while the writhing pitcher ground the ball into his hip,

Defiance gleamed in Casey’s eye, a sneer curled Casey’s lip.

And now the leather-covered sphere came hurtling through the air,

And Casey stood a-watching it in haughty grandeur there.

Close by the sturdy batsman the ball unheeded sped—

“That ain’t my style,” said Casey. “Strike one,” the umpire said.

From the benches, black with people, there went up a muffled roar,

Like the beating of the storm-waves on a stern and distant shore.

“Kill him! Kill the umpire!” shouted some one on the stand;

And it’s likely they’d have killed him had not Casey raised his hand.

With a smile of Christian charity great Casey’s visage shone;

He stilled the rising tumult; he bade the game go on;

He signaled to the pitcher, and once more the spheroid flew;

But Casey still ignored it, and the umpire said, “Strike two.”

“Fraud!” cried the maddened thousands, and echo answered fraud;

But one scornful look from Casey and the audience was awed.

They saw his face grow stern and cold, they saw his muscles strain,

And they knew that Casey wouldn’t let that ball go by again.

The sneer is gone from Casey’s lip, his teeth are clinched in hate;

He pounds with cruel violence his bat upon the plate.

And now the pitcher holds the ball, and now he lets it go,

And now the air is shattered by the force of Casey’s blow.

Oh, somewhere in this favored land the sun is shining bright;

The band is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light,

And somewhere men are laughing, and somewhere children shout;

But there is no joy in Mudville—mighty Casey has struck out.

Here’s what the poem looks like when you read only every other line, starting from the second line:

The score stood four to two with but one inning more to play.

A sickly silence fell upon the patrons of the game.

Clung to that hope which springs eternal in the human breast;

We’d put up even money now with Casey at the bat.

And the former was a lulu and the latter was a cake;

For there seemed but little chance of Casey’s getting to the bat.

And Blake, the much despised, tore the cover off the ball;

There was Jimmy safe at second and Flynn a-hugging third.

It rumbled through the valley, it rattled in the dell;

For Casey, mighty Casey, was advancing to the bat.

There was pride in Casey’s bearing and a smile on Casey’s face.

No stranger in the crowd could doubt ’twas Casey at the bat.

Five thousand tongues applauded when he wiped them on his shirt.

Defiance gleamed in Casey’s eye, a sneer curled Casey’s lip.

And Casey stood a-watching it in haughty grandeur there.

“That ain’t my style,” said Casey. “Strike one,” the umpire said.

Like the beating of the storm-waves on a stern and distant shore.

And it’s likely they’d have killed him had not Casey raised his hand.

He stilled the rising tumult; he bade the game go on;

But Casey still ignored it, and the umpire said, “Strike two.”

But one scornful look from Casey and the audience was awed.

And they knew that Casey wouldn’t let that ball go by again.

He pounds with cruel violence his bat upon the plate.

And now the air is shattered by the force of Casey’s blow.

The band is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light,

But there is no joy in Mudville—mighty Casey has struck out.

The reader still gets a sense of what’s going on, if only reading this poem. The pacing of the piece certainly changes, and I think you lose a lot of the crowd’s reactions to the game in this version. The ending is much more abrupt, which I’m not sure if I like or not. I think the original poem benefits for having a few extra lines in the ending. One thing I liked a lot was that the entrance of Casey is characterized by “it” and rumbling in the valley. The original poem makes it clear that the “it” refers to Casey’s voice. This version makes Casey sound like a looming figure approaching from miles away. I still liked this piece out of the two other ones I created, because it makes the most sense after the change.